yard measure (noun)

1. Why was the yard measure such a good comedian? Because it always knew how to deliver the punchline three feet away!

2. In the classic novel, the protagonist used a yard measure to meticulously measure every object in their obsessive-compulsive quest for perfection.

3. As the terrifying creature approached, the protagonist grabbed the yard measure and swung it at the monster with all their might, hoping to fend it off.

4. In the cartoon, the character grabbed a yard measure and comically tried to measure their excessively long nose, resulting in hilarious mishaps and absurd measurements.